Tuesday, July 8, 2014
Anita
I'll have to catch up with Anita in the next couple of days. I have to go to bed early because tomorrow I am FINALLY going to see the physical therapist. Send good thoughts! Here's hoping my neck and shoulder are more or less normal.
Monday, July 7, 2014
Meet my character blog tour
Just a note that I do already have a book out. It is a different world from Morgandy's, but if you would like an idea of who I am as a writer or if you'd just like to follow me on Goodreads, here's the link.
I think I might do another version of this post where Morgandy actually answers in her own voice, but for now you get this:
1) What is the name of your character? Is he/she fictional or a historic person?
Her name is Morgandy Rainbear MacNeil. She is a fictional person.
2) When and where is the story set?
Morgandy’s story is set in modern day San Fransisco. While this fictional version of San Fransisco does have many recognizable real world elements, it is an inherently magical city. In Morgandy’s world magic has always been out in the open, and therefore therianthropes, witches, vampires, and so on have helped shape history from the earliest times.
3) What should we know about him/her?
Morgandy is a no nonsense homicide detective working San Fransisco’s Tenderloin district. She has to succeed at her job with very few resources even when solving high profile cases, since the Tenderloin police department is the smallest of its kind in the city. Morgandy also happens to be a witch, and uses her powers as investigative tools. The reader will see her call up ghosts, utilize magical shielding, take advantage of psychic awareness and more. Also, San Fransisco’s magical community operates on a spell barter system, and Morgandy has to complete various tasks in order to learn spells that will aid her in the story’s main conflict.
Morgandy has a temper and is always caught between her lack of patience for people bullshitting her and wanting to be a good cop who doesn’t throw her weight around. She takes on the complicated task of walking the middle road between corruption and getting the job done, especially since police officers are allowed to commit certain crimes themselves to keep their undercover personas intact. Morgandy’s limits will be tested in just such a way in the course of the book.
She also struggles with her mixed heritage. While she has both Irish and Salish blood, her looks mark her as a person of color and she experiences discrimination and difficulties because of this. However, despite a close relationship with her Native American father, her cultural connection to the reservation and the rest of her family is in shambles. She resists repairing these rifts, because she perceives a lack of empathy from the Native side of her family. Of course, perspective can be a funny thing and it’s often incorrect. Whether she manages to accept her heritage and therefore herself is something only reading the book can truly answer!
4) What is the main conflict? What messes up his/her life?
Morgandy’s tale has two main conflicts. One is professional, the conflict between wanting to execute a successful undercover sting and the lengths Morgandy is willing to go to in order to accomplish that. The other conflict is personal. Morgandy had a serious accident as a child—a fall from her favorite horse—but she has the deeply unsettling sense that she might not know the whole story.
5) What is the personal goal of the character?
Morgandy wants to be a credit to her uniform and has sacrificed the possibility of personal relationships in pursuit of this goal. Other than her best friend Serafina, Morgandy is a loner, ambitious and willing to do what it takes to resolve conflicts and bring criminals to justice.
6) Is there a working title for this novel, and can we read more about it?
The working title for this novel is Aim For Blue, and there are several excerpts available at my blog. Follow my blog for further updates on this title. There is an Aim For Blue tag that should take you to all the excerpts.
7) When can we expect the book to be published?
Any date I give would be a very rough approximation, but I hope to have the first draft more or less done by the coming fall.
I'm tagging Avery Teoda , so go to his blog a week from now to see his character interview.
Thanks to Melissa Veracruz for inviting me to be part of this tour. Melissa grew up in a tiny Texas town. She’s still in Texas, in the Houston area. She and her husband are raising three children and a handicapable Chihuahua. She began telling stories in her head as a small child and recently found out she could write it all down (using cheap clicky pens). Her debut novel, Absolutely, is the first in the Larson, Texas Series.
Website: http://literaryhomebody.com/
Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/8281226.Melissa_Veracruz
1) What is the name of your character? Is he/she fictional or a historic person?
Her name is Morgandy Rainbear MacNeil. She is a fictional person.
2) When and where is the story set?
Morgandy’s story is set in modern day San Fransisco. While this fictional version of San Fransisco does have many recognizable real world elements, it is an inherently magical city. In Morgandy’s world magic has always been out in the open, and therefore therianthropes, witches, vampires, and so on have helped shape history from the earliest times.
3) What should we know about him/her?
Morgandy is a no nonsense homicide detective working San Fransisco’s Tenderloin district. She has to succeed at her job with very few resources even when solving high profile cases, since the Tenderloin police department is the smallest of its kind in the city. Morgandy also happens to be a witch, and uses her powers as investigative tools. The reader will see her call up ghosts, utilize magical shielding, take advantage of psychic awareness and more. Also, San Fransisco’s magical community operates on a spell barter system, and Morgandy has to complete various tasks in order to learn spells that will aid her in the story’s main conflict.
Morgandy has a temper and is always caught between her lack of patience for people bullshitting her and wanting to be a good cop who doesn’t throw her weight around. She takes on the complicated task of walking the middle road between corruption and getting the job done, especially since police officers are allowed to commit certain crimes themselves to keep their undercover personas intact. Morgandy’s limits will be tested in just such a way in the course of the book.
She also struggles with her mixed heritage. While she has both Irish and Salish blood, her looks mark her as a person of color and she experiences discrimination and difficulties because of this. However, despite a close relationship with her Native American father, her cultural connection to the reservation and the rest of her family is in shambles. She resists repairing these rifts, because she perceives a lack of empathy from the Native side of her family. Of course, perspective can be a funny thing and it’s often incorrect. Whether she manages to accept her heritage and therefore herself is something only reading the book can truly answer!
4) What is the main conflict? What messes up his/her life?
Morgandy’s tale has two main conflicts. One is professional, the conflict between wanting to execute a successful undercover sting and the lengths Morgandy is willing to go to in order to accomplish that. The other conflict is personal. Morgandy had a serious accident as a child—a fall from her favorite horse—but she has the deeply unsettling sense that she might not know the whole story.
5) What is the personal goal of the character?
Morgandy wants to be a credit to her uniform and has sacrificed the possibility of personal relationships in pursuit of this goal. Other than her best friend Serafina, Morgandy is a loner, ambitious and willing to do what it takes to resolve conflicts and bring criminals to justice.
6) Is there a working title for this novel, and can we read more about it?
The working title for this novel is Aim For Blue, and there are several excerpts available at my blog. Follow my blog for further updates on this title. There is an Aim For Blue tag that should take you to all the excerpts.
7) When can we expect the book to be published?
Any date I give would be a very rough approximation, but I hope to have the first draft more or less done by the coming fall.
I'm tagging Avery Teoda , so go to his blog a week from now to see his character interview.
Thanks to Melissa Veracruz for inviting me to be part of this tour. Melissa grew up in a tiny Texas town. She’s still in Texas, in the Houston area. She and her husband are raising three children and a handicapable Chihuahua. She began telling stories in her head as a small child and recently found out she could write it all down (using cheap clicky pens). Her debut novel, Absolutely, is the first in the Larson, Texas Series.
Website: http://literaryhomebody.com/
Goodreads: https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/8281226.Melissa_Veracruz
And Katheryn J. Avila has always dreamed of being a published author, and recently, that dream has come true! Her novel, Reckoning, is the first in a paranormal sci-fi trilogy she’s titled The Breach. Reckoning tells the story of Lexia, a young woman who discovers that she’s psychic and is thrown into the dangerous world of the supernatural, where she must place her trust in an unexpected ally in order to protect her family.
Website: http://about.me/
Twitter: @katheryn_avila
Sunday, July 6, 2014
Narcissus in Chains Chapter Forty Two
Dottie's break down here
Seriously, what the fuck is happening here? I ask because the cops just drove away and left Anita at the crime scene. She is literally standing around looking at the blood on her floor. WAT. This makes zero sense. This place would be cordoned off and they would have her ass down at the station questioning her. Even if they're going to cover it up because who cares about shapeshifters (sigh) they would at least go through the basic motions of investigating just as a cover your ass measure. Goddamit, these books are so stupid. I know I say that a lot but sometimes I'm just left so flat footed by the mistakes that I can't come up with anything more articulate.
Anita at least has the deceny to admit that without Claudia and Igor to help her, she'd probably be dead. Nathaniel turns up because he figures he ought to clean the broken glass off the floor. Anita starts to react to the stress of everything that has happened now that the immediate danger is over. She's trying desperately not to cry, and won't let Nathaniel comfort her for fear that she won't be able to hold back if he hugs her.
"I'd already cried once today; that was all I was allowed."
Ouch. I feel for her in this scene. She's so hamstrung emotionally that she can't figure out how to properly express her feelings. She's spent so long dealing with the immense stress in her life by simply charging forward willy nilly that now she doesn't have the skills that would allow her to properly purge her stress, stress that must be sending her to an early grave by now. It's sad,desperately sad.
I think one of LKH's fundamental issues as a writer is that she seems incapable of viewing her work as a story separate from herself. Of course an author should empathize with their characters, but if that author can't step back and take an objective look at their manuscript, well, that's a fatal flaw. I say that because if she was capable of the appropriate amount of distance from her creation, this sort of emotional turmoil could make for a very compelling tale. Unfortunately, LKH never learned good study skills (i.e. she is a chronic panster, who finishes everything at the very last second, which means she has no time to edit even if she wanted to) and she's convinced that her shit smells like fresh baked cinnamon rolls. That is to say, she's under the delusion that her readers want to know every puerile, ridiculous thought she's ever had, and they want to hear it through her author avatar.
Or, in short, don't get attached to this moment of emotional realism because LKH is just waiting to disappoint you again.
Nathaniel "shook me by the arm"--jesus that's awkward--which makes him dangerous somehow. However, there's another interesting moment where Anita thinks that she was so focused on forcing him to be autonomous that she never realized she might not approve of his personality once he's become the author of his own destiny. Now that is interesting stuff.
Why are you doing this to me, book?
She realizes she doesn't know Micah well enough to love him. I'll take the flashes of common sense where I can get them.
Nathaniel is put out because Anita won't accept comfort from him. He asks why Anita won't "let him in" and points out that "not everything has to be a fight." She informs him that for her, it does. Why? Again, why? I don't think I've read anything about this character that would justify her extreme aversion to emotional connections. I don't mean to make light of her pain, per se, but a guy rejecting you in college is a hell of a thing to still be caught up on almost fifteen years later. Her mother died and that's terrible, but many people lose parents and don't go on to develop such extreme avoidance.
I guess I have to add avoidant to her list of personality disorders. Except personality disorders are often triggered by childhood trauma (not always, imo there's a biological and genetic component to some of these things) and Anita had, more or less, a very charmed life. She's known loss, but overall she's been well taken care of. She went to college. She has a good job. (in theory, since she never does her job). She has a highly desirable skill set, in that she is an animator, educated, and (supposedly) knows a thing or two about police work. So where is all the angst coming from?
I don't want to make light of what she's been through simply because she has a lot of privilege, but because of that privilege I need to be shown, as the reader, what the genesis of her angst is. It can't be assumed. It becomes less obvious the more privilege a character has. Now, I think privilege can be misused as a concept. I have, many times, seen it used as a bludgeoning tool or as an excuse to dismiss someone's pain. But it is true that the more boxes you can check, the easier certain things become. The gears of the world have a lot of extra grease when you have privilege. Doors open and opportunities afford themselves to you in a way that they might not otherwise.
Anita, for example, didn't grow up in a neighborhood with a lot of gang activity. If she had, I could understand her reluctance to emotionally connect with others since such situations require a certain hard outer shell in order to survive. Or, say, if Anita were presenting as Mexican as opposed to so white she's translucent, that would serve as a kind of short hand for this character has experienced a level of discrimination that white people do not experience, and therefore it has quite rightly made her mistrustful. But Anita has none of those markers, so I need to know her on a deeper level than I do right now. Is she mentally ill? Did a close friend get murdered? Did her father beat her? Something.Because otherwise she just comes across as stubborn and wangsty instead of angsty. No one wants to read the oh woe is me act, especially if it's almost entirely unwarranted.
There's a scene I actually enjoy where Anita and Micah both make the effort to comfort Nathaniel. Micah purrs in human form which I find oddly endearing. Nathaniel cries and that gives Anita permission to cry.
This chapter did not 100% suck. I am shocked.
Thursday, July 3, 2014
Narcissus in Chains Chapter Forty One
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watch this space
I'll have an Anita chapter up later today. I'm working on my manuscript first this time to see if that helps, considering Anita chapters usually tap my strength and my will to live.
Wednesday, July 2, 2014
Narcissus in Chains Chapter Forty
You guys, seriously read Chelsea's Merry Gentry/Elsie Dinsmore sporks. She has some amazing things to say about fundamentalist Christianity that everyone should hear.
Oh right, back to the Anita Blake salt mines.
The snake man has a copper eye and a black outline around said eye, that looks like "dramatic makeup." For some reason I really detest her makeup comparisons. I think because it takes away from the tension. Makeup is not a tense topic. It also implies that the bad guys are putting on an act, that their dangerous natures are not in fact very dangerous, and that we ought to all just go home now. Comparing a battle to a stage play or an evening out at the local dance club is not, in my mind, terribly effective.
There's a lot of thinking going on, stabbed through with commas willy nilly until I'm damn near drowning in the blood of the English language. Some crap about how if Anita shoots the snake guy, snake guy will probably blow Caleb's head off with silver shot. Even Anita acknowledges that she's having trouble caring, which makes me wonder why LKH chose Caleb to be the one put in mortal danger. He's spent the entire novel being a total slug, the kind that leaves sexual harassment ooze to mark its trail. Since he's been getting his sticky, shiny sexism all over everyone for the entirety of this 'novel' I'm actually hoping that he does get his head blown off.
I mean really. Of all the people she could have picked? Caleb? I seriously care more about Micah the rapist. At least he's had more lines. What about Nathaniel, since the set up has been there since the beginning? Or were you just constantly referring to him as "anyone's meat" for the fucking fun of it?
Pictured: Nathaniel.
Bad guy engages in some predictable bad guy talk about how he'll kill Caleb. Claudia informs him that he too will die in that case. Claudia, I believe. Anita, not so much.
"He gave a hissing laugh..."
Seriously, what the fuck does that sound like? Anyone? Because I've got nothing.
Anita realizes more snake people are trying to get in and she actually says something sort of awesome:
"No one else comes through that doorway, or I'll blow you away and let Caleb take his chances."
Well shit, that's more like it.
Caleb only now starts to panic, because he only has emotions when he discovers that Anita doesn't like him much. Shotgun pressed to his temple, fine. Anita won't rescue him and doesn't like him? Panic. Woe.
"The snake-head turned to one side, bird-like."
NO IT ISN'T. IT'S A SNAKE, IT'S SNAKE-LIKE.
This might be an irrational thing to me, but don't compare one animal to another unless you're going to spend a little more time drawing the connection in for me.
This tuna sandwich smells meaty, like chicken! See what I mean? Also, gross.
A fight actually breaks out, but only because Claudia gets sick of talking and blows snake dude's head apart. I wish this book was about Claudia. Oh snap, when I'm done with the first anti AB book I am so writing another one about a mercenary wererat brick shithouse.
Anita shoots him too and ruins the paltry thrill of the only action scene in a hojillion pages by using that stupid as broken eggs "thicker things" NONSENSE THAT MAKES ME IN TO A RAGE MONSTER.
Snake dudes come in, windows break, shots are fired, stuff actually happens. Of course everyone is as cliche as possible the whole time, and Anita even gets to indulge in this old clunker: "like a puppet whose strings had been cut."
That's a demerit, Mrs. Hamilton.
The words door, bullets, cabinets, and shotgun are used so often they become a kind of thick word porridge that my mind-spoon is stuck upright in. Anita becomes Neo from the Matrix as everything randomly slows down. Only now, when Marco shows up for the second time, do I realize that Marco actually is a werelion and not a snake. Another demerit for poor description, Mrs. Hamilton. You're on your way to having your bathroom privileges revoked, plus you won't be attending the school's spirit assembly.
SHE SERIOUSLY HITS ME WITH THIS:
"I had all the time in the world to see the two snakes and the lion man Marco come through in a blur of movement that was so fast I knew that none of them was human."
So, it's the speed that told her they weren't human, even though she introduced them as a lion and two snakes. Okay look, I admit, my first book still has typos and some editing problems (hopefully both will be fixed for the next printing) here and there. I acknowledge that. But holy fuck woman, you were traditionally published! How is this possible? You don't see anyone offering to massage my literary balls in the hopes I'll produce another thick spurt of story the way you must have done for you. No one is feeding me grapes whilst speedily editing my work at a brisk pace, smile included no charge. Fine, fine, maybe you don't actually get grapes, but you do have a team of vetted professionals on your side. How does this sort of crap stay in? This tripe? Fuck that, I love tripe. That is an insult to tripe.
Seriously, try it some time. I'm not kidding. It's delicious.
Anita and Claudia shoot the snakes, but Marco gets a shot off at both Anita and Claudia. Claudia is hurt. Anita is saved by either Micah or Nate (considering they're the only two black leopards, and a black leopard tackled Marco) even though the bullet has already been fired.
Also wow, what the fuck has this house full of fucking leopards been doing this entire time? Just standing around shivering and crying without Anita to tell them what to do, I'll bet, despite being predator animals more than capable of tangling with other shifters.
Merle decides to get a few shots in, finally being depicted as doing something. This fight is all out of order, by the way. It should be something like, inciting event, protag reacts, takes note of what the others around her are doing relative to her own position and actions, repeat. Obviously not as mechanically as all that, but I should have known what Merle was up to before now. The way it's staggered out makes it seem like only now, after the initial gunfire is done, has he decided to come out from his hiding place and kick a guy around for a bit.
Claudia is badly hurt. Her dominant hand and arm are totally mangled, and she's still badass enough to just be like fuck it, and pass her gun to her other hand. That's my girl. I think this book should be about her and Merle. Of course Anita proves that she's an inappropriate sociopathic alien because her only thought is that she hopes clumsy Claudia doesn't shoot her by accident.
Nate shows and actually has a gun in his hand like a competent person. Joke's on you, Anita.
Micah turns up in leopardman form. He has his dick out, because of course he does. Anita insists that she doesn't find his animal form sexy. Okay. Weretiger orgy. That's all I'm going to say. And bear in mind (heh) if she does like animal form and leopardman form, awesome. Have whatever kinks you want. But don't shit in my bowl and call it chocolate ice cream, lady.
Basically Cherry and Zane hid under the kitchen table the whole time, despite the ability to turn in to LEOPARD MONSTERS.
Claudia is very hurt but not shifting, despite having more than enough adrenaline in her to manage it. Igor is probably dead. Oh here come the police, oh woe, because Anita doesn't have time to hide the bodies. I mean shit, why would she? She's obviously just lived through a home invasion and she's ever so white, after all. Claudia can't shift because the cops will shoot any shifters in animal form. WHAT. First how can they fucking tell, and second SHE TURNS IN TO A RAT. They weigh AT THEIR BIGGEST about a pound. Claudia gives us some bullshit about how she needs to sit around and be wounded to prove that a home invasion happened. Cool, well that will only cripple her for life, instead of being a mild inconvenience she could easily heal with shifting.
Micah shifts back to human form. It's "like hard things thrown in wax, covered, melted."
That's the best she can do, eh?
So Micah is human now, but there's shapeshifter goo everywhere. Gosh, this surely won't alert the police as to the presence of weres! Well, actually it probably won't because every single law enforcement officer in the ABverse is but a pathetic straw sexist running around to Benny Hill music.
The police don't shoot Anita because she is a dainty woman.
Oh right, back to the Anita Blake salt mines.
The snake man has a copper eye and a black outline around said eye, that looks like "dramatic makeup." For some reason I really detest her makeup comparisons. I think because it takes away from the tension. Makeup is not a tense topic. It also implies that the bad guys are putting on an act, that their dangerous natures are not in fact very dangerous, and that we ought to all just go home now. Comparing a battle to a stage play or an evening out at the local dance club is not, in my mind, terribly effective.
There's a lot of thinking going on, stabbed through with commas willy nilly until I'm damn near drowning in the blood of the English language. Some crap about how if Anita shoots the snake guy, snake guy will probably blow Caleb's head off with silver shot. Even Anita acknowledges that she's having trouble caring, which makes me wonder why LKH chose Caleb to be the one put in mortal danger. He's spent the entire novel being a total slug, the kind that leaves sexual harassment ooze to mark its trail. Since he's been getting his sticky, shiny sexism all over everyone for the entirety of this 'novel' I'm actually hoping that he does get his head blown off.
I mean really. Of all the people she could have picked? Caleb? I seriously care more about Micah the rapist. At least he's had more lines. What about Nathaniel, since the set up has been there since the beginning? Or were you just constantly referring to him as "anyone's meat" for the fucking fun of it?
Pictured: Nathaniel.
Bad guy engages in some predictable bad guy talk about how he'll kill Caleb. Claudia informs him that he too will die in that case. Claudia, I believe. Anita, not so much.
"He gave a hissing laugh..."
Seriously, what the fuck does that sound like? Anyone? Because I've got nothing.
Anita realizes more snake people are trying to get in and she actually says something sort of awesome:
"No one else comes through that doorway, or I'll blow you away and let Caleb take his chances."
Well shit, that's more like it.
Caleb only now starts to panic, because he only has emotions when he discovers that Anita doesn't like him much. Shotgun pressed to his temple, fine. Anita won't rescue him and doesn't like him? Panic. Woe.
"The snake-head turned to one side, bird-like."
NO IT ISN'T. IT'S A SNAKE, IT'S SNAKE-LIKE.
This might be an irrational thing to me, but don't compare one animal to another unless you're going to spend a little more time drawing the connection in for me.
This tuna sandwich smells meaty, like chicken! See what I mean? Also, gross.
A fight actually breaks out, but only because Claudia gets sick of talking and blows snake dude's head apart. I wish this book was about Claudia. Oh snap, when I'm done with the first anti AB book I am so writing another one about a mercenary wererat brick shithouse.
Anita shoots him too and ruins the paltry thrill of the only action scene in a hojillion pages by using that stupid as broken eggs "thicker things" NONSENSE THAT MAKES ME IN TO A RAGE MONSTER.
Snake dudes come in, windows break, shots are fired, stuff actually happens. Of course everyone is as cliche as possible the whole time, and Anita even gets to indulge in this old clunker: "like a puppet whose strings had been cut."
That's a demerit, Mrs. Hamilton.
The words door, bullets, cabinets, and shotgun are used so often they become a kind of thick word porridge that my mind-spoon is stuck upright in. Anita becomes Neo from the Matrix as everything randomly slows down. Only now, when Marco shows up for the second time, do I realize that Marco actually is a werelion and not a snake. Another demerit for poor description, Mrs. Hamilton. You're on your way to having your bathroom privileges revoked, plus you won't be attending the school's spirit assembly.
SHE SERIOUSLY HITS ME WITH THIS:
"I had all the time in the world to see the two snakes and the lion man Marco come through in a blur of movement that was so fast I knew that none of them was human."
So, it's the speed that told her they weren't human, even though she introduced them as a lion and two snakes. Okay look, I admit, my first book still has typos and some editing problems (hopefully both will be fixed for the next printing) here and there. I acknowledge that. But holy fuck woman, you were traditionally published! How is this possible? You don't see anyone offering to massage my literary balls in the hopes I'll produce another thick spurt of story the way you must have done for you. No one is feeding me grapes whilst speedily editing my work at a brisk pace, smile included no charge. Fine, fine, maybe you don't actually get grapes, but you do have a team of vetted professionals on your side. How does this sort of crap stay in? This tripe? Fuck that, I love tripe. That is an insult to tripe.
Seriously, try it some time. I'm not kidding. It's delicious.
Anita and Claudia shoot the snakes, but Marco gets a shot off at both Anita and Claudia. Claudia is hurt. Anita is saved by either Micah or Nate (considering they're the only two black leopards, and a black leopard tackled Marco) even though the bullet has already been fired.
Also wow, what the fuck has this house full of fucking leopards been doing this entire time? Just standing around shivering and crying without Anita to tell them what to do, I'll bet, despite being predator animals more than capable of tangling with other shifters.
Merle decides to get a few shots in, finally being depicted as doing something. This fight is all out of order, by the way. It should be something like, inciting event, protag reacts, takes note of what the others around her are doing relative to her own position and actions, repeat. Obviously not as mechanically as all that, but I should have known what Merle was up to before now. The way it's staggered out makes it seem like only now, after the initial gunfire is done, has he decided to come out from his hiding place and kick a guy around for a bit.
Claudia is badly hurt. Her dominant hand and arm are totally mangled, and she's still badass enough to just be like fuck it, and pass her gun to her other hand. That's my girl. I think this book should be about her and Merle. Of course Anita proves that she's an inappropriate sociopathic alien because her only thought is that she hopes clumsy Claudia doesn't shoot her by accident.
Nate shows and actually has a gun in his hand like a competent person. Joke's on you, Anita.
Micah turns up in leopardman form. He has his dick out, because of course he does. Anita insists that she doesn't find his animal form sexy. Okay. Weretiger orgy. That's all I'm going to say. And bear in mind (heh) if she does like animal form and leopardman form, awesome. Have whatever kinks you want. But don't shit in my bowl and call it chocolate ice cream, lady.
Basically Cherry and Zane hid under the kitchen table the whole time, despite the ability to turn in to LEOPARD MONSTERS.
Claudia is very hurt but not shifting, despite having more than enough adrenaline in her to manage it. Igor is probably dead. Oh here come the police, oh woe, because Anita doesn't have time to hide the bodies. I mean shit, why would she? She's obviously just lived through a home invasion and she's ever so white, after all. Claudia can't shift because the cops will shoot any shifters in animal form. WHAT. First how can they fucking tell, and second SHE TURNS IN TO A RAT. They weigh AT THEIR BIGGEST about a pound. Claudia gives us some bullshit about how she needs to sit around and be wounded to prove that a home invasion happened. Cool, well that will only cripple her for life, instead of being a mild inconvenience she could easily heal with shifting.
Micah shifts back to human form. It's "like hard things thrown in wax, covered, melted."
That's the best she can do, eh?
So Micah is human now, but there's shapeshifter goo everywhere. Gosh, this surely won't alert the police as to the presence of weres! Well, actually it probably won't because every single law enforcement officer in the ABverse is but a pathetic straw sexist running around to Benny Hill music.
The police don't shoot Anita because she is a dainty woman.
Tuesday, July 1, 2014
Narcissus in Chains Chapter Thirty Nine
So, I completely spaced doing the next couple chapters on schedule. On Monday and Wednesday I go to the powerlifting gym and when I'm done I'm so tired I pretty much fall right in to bed when I get home. So, to make it up to you I'll try to get through a couple of these today.
Anita is so consumed with woe she can't even manage to have significant protagonist dreams. Is she guilty over raping Richard? Ha, you sweet summer child. She is in fact sad that Richard thinks she's too comfortable with the monsters. Which by the way is a completely fair assessment, considering she fed on his energy exactly as a vampire with the ardeur would.
Cherry licks Anita until she wakes up. Don't worry, she's not licking anywhere exciting because then LKH might have to write explicit enthusiastic sex, which is never going to happen. Plus it would get gay cooties all over Anita and god knows we can't have that. Also, gross. Once when I was but an adolescent, a person kissing me missed and licked my face instead. I still shudder at the memory, because it's horrible and awkward. But I guess if you're a wereleopard, it becomes magical and a sign of friendship. Even though Cherry is all, I am sustained by your beautiful salty tears, nom nom. Zane is here too. Who gives a fuck? Not me. He will serve no purpose whatsoever.
Anita is all, you said I was having a nightmare which must mean it's night time! OR it could be that people will say nightmare regardless of the actual time.
Anita kicks Cherry and Zane out so she can get dressed. She tells them to put clothes on too because it will make her feel better. Good lord, woman, could you be more of a body shamer?
Anita has to put on weapons to go to the fucking bathroom. She needs to get that PTSD looked at, seriously, because this kind of thing is the sign of a mental disorder not the much vaunted "practicality" that everyone cracks on about.
Anita looks in the mirror and describes herself as "a shock victim." Fuck you very much. If anyone should be in shock, it's Richard.
Wah, Richard won't be her boyfriend anymore. Wah, maybe he won't let her be bolverk (the pack's evil doer) either. Well, she's going to insist because otherwise Richard will doom the pack to "rack and ruin" because Anita is a character in a shitty King Arthur reenactment.
"I huddled my weapons around me like comfort objects."
Even she knows how lame this is. Not to mention she goes on and on and fucking ON about her weapons, yet she very rarely uses them. I mean really, how many fights has she actually been in so far? One?
The next passage proves that Anita just whines about not being beautiful for the attention it brings her:
..."I look great in black. The black-on-black look made my skin look almost translucent, like it should have glowed. I looked almost ethereal, like a wingless angel on a bad day."
Guys, Anita is so white she almost glows.
This is the whitest thing that has ever happened.
If you're feeling bad over a breakup, ladies, "the best revenge is looking good."
Anita goes out to the kitchen, and all the leopards are there dressed like extras on the set of the Village People music video. Igor and Claudia are here too.
"Claudia had cop eyes, or bad guy eyes, the eyes of someone who doesn't let you see what's inside. I didn't mean women with eyes like that, outside of the police."
Basically, the majority of women have to be constantly put down so Anita can remain their perfect queen, better in every way than the average female idiot. Why, rather than such worthless fripperies as makeup, Anita has guns. Anita is better than you. Instead of high heels--it is to laugh!--she has, um, MORE GUNS! Anita is tougher than you. Instead of enjoying sex, she has to be coerced in to it, thus remaining pure. Anita is more virginal than you.
Also really, how many people do you meet on a daily basis that have the kind of obvious emotional compartmentalization Claudia has? I would say in my daily life I encounter and equal number of cis men and cis women, and most of them are friendly, appropriately open people who have expressive eyes and mouths. Certainly they have parts of themselves they don't show to acquaintances, but that's not particularly unusual. They don't hulk around in the shadows and make serious faces. Even the power lifters, who have to be some of the friendliest people I know despite being physically intimidating.
"If her face had been a little softer, she'd have been beautiful. But there was something in the set of her jaw, the way she held that full mouth that said, back off, no touching. It robbed her of something that would have changed everything about her."
Anita is threatened by Claudia's legitimate badassery, because maybe somewhere inside she realizes that she herself is just a jumped up little bully playing dress up.
Merle is here, inexplicably wearing a redneck tuxedo (denim pants and jacket) over a bare torso. Why are these people allergic to shirts? I own a denim jacket and I can only imagine how uncomfortable it would be against bare skin for any period of time. His armpits must be a red irritated mess.
Anita hates sitting with her back to a window or door, because she is so badass and knows the ways of the enemy so well. Apparently LKH has this problem too, but not because of a disorder like PTSD that could very well include this kind of hyper vigilance. If I recall correctly when she talked about this particular quirk, it was expressly because she'd been writing Anita for so long that she picked up the trait herself.
She admits she's being paranoid at least.
The doorbell rings and Caleb goes to answer it, since they ordered food.
Speaking of Caleb, he is in the doghouse because he tried to get handsy with Cherry and Claudia. This is ridiculous. Why do they keep this guy around, and how come no one has sat him down for a serious come to Jesus? This is not acceptable behavior. It is not cute. It is not an exasperating personality quirk. It is harassment and it makes people feel unsafe and objectified. If it were me I'd kick him out of the pack so quick and hard he'd fucking bounce.
Claudia at least made it very clear to him that his advances were unwelcome. Her eyes are cold so Anita's eyes must also grow cold. Oh my god, I am sick of hearing about her special eyes.
And I will never believe she's a badass just because LKH keeps telling me she is. So far she's been in one fight where she got her ass kicked. She healed Gregory after one horribly failed attempt, and then had to be shown what to do by someone else. Even then she succeeded based mostly on luck. Everything else has either been her being raped or raping someone else, sleeping, and healing. Plus a bunch of bullshit about who is sitting where in the kitchen and other mind numbing minutiae.
Claudia is a badass, you guys, which is so weird and wrong for a woman who is not Anita that Anita has to comment on it constantly.
"It made me feel sexist to say that it [Claudia's coldness towards Caleb] was more unnerving coming from a woman, but it was still true."
Anita is one of those insufferable assholes who constantly says offensive bullshit, and when people get justifiably upset they counter with "I'm just so honest. People can't handle my honesty." Sorry to break it to you, cupcake, but you're really just a shitsack.
Hey here come some snake people with Caleb as their hostage. If anyone moves, they'll kill him. Please do! Wow, maybe there will be a second fight now. We're only SEVENTY THREE PERCENT DONE WITH THIS TERRIBLE BOOK.
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