Now, I am no gun expert but wouldn't being submerged in water render them useless? Why is this book so stupid? And considering Anita is supposed to be super attached to these weapons, why wouldn't she care for them properly and take them off before getting in the tub?
The chapter is two sentences in and already I am banging my head on my desk.
And then it gets dumber.
They took Damian back to Anita's house, despite him going in to convulsions. Are you seriously telling me one of J.C.'s businesses only has one bathtub and it happens to be the one Gretchen is in? When the last couple of chapters had far too many 'jokes' about how much J.C. loves baths? This is the kind of shit you vomit up in Draft Zero, when your only goal is to get words on the page. You don't just leave it there. Editing, kids. It could save your life. Or at least your career.
ARE YOU SERIOUSLY TELLING ME THAT AT NO TIME IN THAT CAR RIDE DID ANITA THINK GEE, MAYBE I SHOULDN'T TAKE MY IMPROBABLE ARESENAL IN TO THE BATH WITH ME?
"They'd filled the bathtub with hot, hot water..."
Funny because this book makes my brain fill up with hot, hot rage.
HOLD ON. STOP EVERYTHING. STOP FUCKING EVERYTHING.
YOU GUYS, THERE IS A LYCANTHROPE HOSPITAL.
Holy fucking shit. They took Zane to the lycanthrope hospital.
YOU MEAN TO TELL ME THERE WAS ABSOLUTELY NO REASON FOR THAT BULLSHIT WITH GREGORY? YOU MEAN TO TELL ME HE COULD HAVE GONE TO A HOSPITAL AT ANY TIME?
What the fuck. I am gobsmacked. Completely thrown for a loop. This is just indefensible. In one stupid decision LKH negated the whole first half of her book, such as it is. It wasn't exactly standing firm on its own as it was, but this has just cut it off at the knees.
So only Anita's touch will heal Damian, which is why they're in the bath together. Because Damian is Anita's vampire servant you see, which seems to confuse everyone even though I thought we'd established this fact already in the preceeding chapters. Apparently it is possible for a necromancer to take a vampire servant, but of course no one has seen this happen in forever so Asher can fondle Anita's balls about how special she is.
How come no one knows a thing about how vampires and necromancers interact? You'd think that would be fairly common knowledge by now; the connection is so obvious.
Even the way Asher wears a towel is gendered: "...smoothing the long towel under his knees in a gesture you don't see much in men."
Only now does Asher suggest that Anita take off her clothes.
"You offering to disrobe with no magic to prompt you. Now that is a first."
Anita, being unwilling to take clothes off in front of Asher to the point where you get in the tub fully dressed is really fucking weird. It does not make you more moral or modest. It just makes you sound mentally ill, or like a seriously poor decision maker.
Apparently this tub can hold Anita, Damian, and Asher because Asher has just got in to it to help Anita undress. Jesus Christ, how big is this fucking thing? They're in Anita's house now, too. I'd accept it if they were at one of J.C.'s over the top clubs, but what house has a tub so big you can fit three grown adults in it, with enough room left over for one of them to undress the other?
And now Nate is in the tub too?
Anita keeps telling them to get her clothes off because she's too hot from the bath. Nathaniel seems confused about how to do this, while allowing Anita to maintain skin contact with Damian at the same time. We've covered the fact that Anita needs her clothes off like six times now.
Anita pukes. Nate rips her clothes off. Gil comes in to clean it all up.
"He was a good flunkie."
Good to know you hold your allies in high esteem, Anita.
Anita passes out. Thank god, because that means the chapter is over.
No comments:
Post a Comment